Radiation--Week 8: RADIATION IS DONE! September 8-12, 2014

Radiation--Week 8:  September 8-12, 2014

This is my final week of radiation! 

Monday, September 8, 2014
Today was my 32nd of 34 treatments.  This is the LAST Monday I have to walk into the cancer center first thing in the  morning and start my week off with radiation.  I walked in ready to conquer this week and close this chapter of my life.  I'm very much OVER radiation.  As my photos below show, my skin is almost completely healed along the top and between my breasts.  The new skin is very soft and smooth.  The area beneath my breast, under my arm and onto my abdomen is still peeling.  I still have some ugly, brown skin that needs to come off, so I have a very distinct line between new skin and the old radiated skin.  It's slowly coming off though.  I'll be glad when it's gone so I don't catch people staring at it while I'm at the gym!  The scar area that's currently being radiated looks very good and shows no signs of damage.  I didn't snap any pictures after this treatment. 


Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Today was my 33rd of 34 treatments.  Sheer determination that tomorrow is my FINAL radiation sent me walking into that building.  My dissolution hearing is at 8:30 a.m. in the morning, so I won't get my final treatment until later in the day.  I find it ironic that my marriage is officially over on the same day in which radiation treatment is over.  At any rate, tomorrow will be a BIG day for me.  I plan to continue posting photos even after radiation has ended until my skin is completely healed so those facing radiation can see how long it took my skin to recover. 

 

 

Wednesday, September 10, 2014
Today was my  LAST treatment!  I have completed 34 of 34 treatments!  I can't even begin to explain how good it felt to finish up these treatments and the entire cancer process in general!  I have one more stage to complete my reconstruction process--nipple tattooing, but that is simply a few hours.  I have several tattoos already, so I know what to expect for that.  I also have to have a full hysterectomy in November since I'm BRCA1 positive, but I'm not focused on that right now.  In this moment, I'm simply celebrating the fact that I have completed this breast cancer nightmare all before I hit my one year anniversary date from the day I was told I had breast cancer. 

I give God the credit for how well I've come through all my treatments and the blessings in my life.  I'm not superwoman, and there is nothing special about me in general; but I know without a doubt I have breezed through these treatments because God has kept his hand on me.  Even when things were very difficult and I felt like God had forgotten me, he was right there holding me up.  I'm so very thankful for the blessings in my life.  Even my darkest days were manageable because of God's grace, love and mercy. 

My dissolution was final this morning.  It was an emotionally trying morning, and it was a little bittersweet to start my day with a dissolution but finish it while closing the cancer chapter on my breasts.  I was quite tired that evening and literally crashed and slept most of the evening and through the night.  Emotionally, I was just drained. 

My photos below show how well I'm healing.  I still have a distinctive line on my abdomen where the new skin is lighter in color, but time will take care of that.  I just need a little sun to even things up.  Nothing hurts anymore from radiation.  The only residual effect I notice is my left breast is tighter than my right.  I can feel the muscle on that side tensed up and tight.  This causes that implant to sit a little higher and not look as natural as the right, but I'm told this tense and tight feeling will go away now that I'm done with radiation.  This is simply my body's reaction to the radiation that was directed right on that breast. 

Thursday, September 11, 2014
I woke up today to my alarm I had used the past 6 weeks for radiation.  As I was walking out my front door thinking "Ugh....I don't want to go to radiation", it dawned on me that I didn't have radiation.  As awesome as that felt, I then realized I was late for work!  My radiation was always at 9 am, so I would always go to radiation first then go right to work.  It was quite funny to realize I was so tired the night before that I didn't even change my alarm or have the foresight to truly enjoy the fact that I was done with radiation every morning to start my day. 

It felt amazing to NOT start my day with radiation.  It's one more step toward leaving cancer behind and moving on with my life.  I'm ready to keep moving forward toward brighter and happier days.  For too long, I've wasted days, months, and even years allowing others to steal my happiness.  Life is a gift, and we should be enjoying every second we are blessed with.  My promise to myself is to never waste another moment not appreciating the life I've been given or waste a second of my life on things or people that don't make me happy. 

I didn't take photos for this day, but I will be posting more photos soon to show how my skin is healing.  For this week, I'm going to take a break from the boob pictures and just enjoy my weekend!

Have a Happy Period =)

It's been six months since I had my last chemo on March 7, 2014.  It's hard to believe six months has already gone by as I've lived SO much in the past six months.  My life has changed so much over the past six months, and the sun is truly shining on every day again.  I wake up with a new zest for life, a smile on my face, and an eagerness to face my day--even if it's spent at work.  I'm alive and for that, I'm truly thankful. 

Cancer and chemo took many things away from me.  My hair, my smile, my marriage, my happiness, and my periods.  Yep, you read that right.  After my first chemo treatment, I stopped having my monthly cycle.  In its place, I got daily hot flashes that made me feel like a fire was consuming my body.  I would want nothing more than to stand outside in the snow in an attempt to put out the fire raging inside my body.  Chemo threw my body into premature menopause.  Gone were my periods, signs of estrogen, and feeling like a woman.  I felt like a dried up old lady in every way you can imagine.  I hated every second of it!  The hot flashes were absolutely miserable.  One minute I was sweating so bad I felt like I needed to shower multiple times per day and the next I was freezing to death.

My doctors warned me that some women's bodies do not recover from the early menopause that chemo causes.  So I've been preparing myself to likely never see periods again.  Not that I like having a period in particular, but it was just one more thing that was taken from me long before I was ready.   The past two months, I've experienced some MAJOR cramps.  All in my lower back and directly in my ovaries.  While sitting in meetings at work, there were a few times I truly felt like my ovaries were exploding.  It felt like everything was waking up at once.  Oh, and that "dried" up feeling?  Yeah, that's gone too.  Everything is back to normal--all you ladies will know exactly what I'm talking about.  ;)

Today, right in the middle of a very busy work day, my period decided to show up.  Normally, I would be annoyed and complaining; but it made my day.  Who knew?!  My body is truly one hell of a warrior to have survived all it's survived, and here it is trying to procreate and make a baby.  Apparently, my body is just as stubborn as I am.  So, for the ladies out there wondering if they will get their periods back, it took mine 6 months to show up. 

Now, pass me the Midol.....

Radiation--Week 7: September 2-5, 2014

Radiation--Week 7:  September 2-5, 2014

Monday, September 1, 2014
I did not have treatment today since it's Labor Day.  Yay!  A day off!  However, I wanted to say I had an absolutely fabulous weekend.  On Saturday, August 30, I turned 41 years young.  I had a party at my house, and it was quite an enjoyable celebration with my friends and family.  I am truly blessed to have so many people in my life who love me!  I've included a few photos from my party below. 

Tuesday, September 2, 2014
Today was my 28th radiation treatment, and my last full area treatment!  I can't even begin to explain how happy I am to have completed this portion of my radiation.  The areas that are the most sensitive and hurt the most are areas that will no longer be radiated after today, so they can now begin healing without any further damage.  I feel so very blessed to have made it so far with so little side effects.  Today, she set up the machine for my next 6 treatments, which will target the scar only on my left breast.  These 6 treatments will complete my radiation, and I can officially close this chapter of my life!

Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Today, I had my 29th of 34 treatments. As you will see from the photos below, my skin is really dried out and beginning to peel off in earnest.  It's  mostly all peeled off and revealed smooth, new skin between my breasts.  I'm having issues under my arm and beneath my breast now.  Thankfully, I'm done getting radiation in these areas so it can truly begin to heal now.  The radiation I am getting now only targets the scar across my left breast. 

 

Thursday, September 4, 2014
Today, I finished up 30 of 34 treatments.  I have finally reached the 30's, which means I'm almost done!  I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!  My skin is still very red in some areas and just a very ugly brown and peeling in others.  It's still sore, but it definitely feels better than it did.  I look like I worshiped the tanning bed way too much! 

Friday, September 5, 2014
I have completed my LAST Friday doing radiation treatment!  Whoop Whoop!!  Today, I finished 31 of 34 treatments.  I can't even begin to say how excited I am to almost be done with this!  The photos below show how my skin is all turning very brown.  Almost all of the redness has calmed down, and my skin just looks like it's peeling/dead from a very bad sunburn or even like I was burned in a fire.  I use a washcloth in the shower each day and gently rub it across the skin so it will peel off.  It's helping to keep all the dead skin off me and reveal the new skin.  It also keeps me from wanting to pick at it!  I'm not nearly as sore as I was prior to finishing up the full area treatments, and I am so glad for that.  It was truly starting to hurt!  I only have three more left Monday through Wednesday of next week.  Bring it!  I'm ready to be done with radiation!

Radiation--Week 6: August 25-29, 2014

Radiation--Week 6:  August 25-29, 2014

Monday, August 25, 2014
Today, I had my 23rd radiation treatment.  Needless to say, I'm very much over getting radiation every morning.  My skin is truly getting very sensitive and not recovering as quickly.  Granted, I realize I am very fortunate to have had so little side effects compared to many other people out there; but it is getting quite painful.  The most painful area at this time is directly beneath my left breast and down my abdomen.  I have a scar from my fill port when I had expanders on my rib in this area, and it's very tender.  The radiation is really irritating it.  I filled my prescription that was given to me to help my skin heal, and it does help a lot.  I wish it had been given to me much sooner.  The cream is called Silvadene.  I recommend asking for this before you see radiation burns on your skin if your doctor will call it in for you.

The photos below are marked 25 of 34; however, they are my 23rd treatment.   I confused the date with the treatment number!

 

 

Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Today was radiation number 24.  I didn't take photos this evening as my skin looks identical to the photos from yesterday.  I don't have much to report besides I'm really tired of doing this.  After today, I only have 4 more radiation treatments left that target the large "box" area.  The final six after that will be the scar on my left breast only.  So, while I won't be completely done as of this coming Tuesday, it's a milestone, and I'm getting very close! 

Wednesday, August 27, 2014
Today, after treatment 25, I began noticing that my skin is truly flaking off in the area between my breasts and along the top of my left breast.  It's as if I had a very bad sunburn, and the dead skin is peeling off.  It's pretty gross as it rolls off like black dirt. It really looks like I simply had a layer of dirt on me that was coming off in gross layers.  It didn't hurt when it came off, and it actually made my skin look better.  The area between my breast is not tender anymore, but the area beneath my left breast is extremely sensitive.  Only a few more left on the full area!

The photos below are marked 27 of 34; but I again screwed up when putting the text on the photos.  These are actually 25 of 34.  Also, ignore the black markings on my skin.  I was marked today preparing for my radiation that targets the scar area only. 

Thursday, August 28, 2014
Today was treatment 26.  Only two more full area treatments after today.  I can see the light at the end of this!  More skin is peeling off between my breasts.  It's really gross and still looks I have a layer of dirt on my skin.  I'm a bit OCD, so it's making me nuts! 

The photos below were after today's treatment:  26 of 34.  Again, I marked them wrong!

Friday, August 29, 2014
Today is my next to last full radiation treatment!  I won't have radiation on Monday due to Labor Day; so I get a three day break for my skin to heal up a little.  As you can see in the photos above, my skin needs a small break.  It's very sore!  I don't have photos from today as I was extremely busy all evening preparing for my birthday party cookout we are having at my house tomorrow night.  I didn't get to celebrate turning 40 last year, and I have so much to celebrate this year.  So I plan to celebrate double this year!