Me and my daughter, Makya, at the gym last night. 
..............................................................................About seven years ago, I began running. It began as an escape when my previous marriage started having issues. It was a way for me to clear my head and think. Running was an outlet for me to work out frustrations. My health wasn't my goal at the time. It was truly an escape. But the more I did it, the more I discovered I actually enjoyed it. I enjoyed pushing myself to run a little farther and a little longer each day. Each time I added more distance, I wondered if I could go a little farther the next time. It felt good to sweat. As strange as it may sound, I enjoyed getting back to my house as sweaty and gross as possible. The more I would sweat, the more frustration I was able to get rid of.
Running became a passion of mine before I knew it. I continued running through and after my divorce. It was no longer just an outlet for me; but I began to realize how much better I felt. I had more energy, and my body was more toned. I wasn't trying to lose weight, but I had; and for the first time in my life, in all the right places. I then began going to the gym in addition to running. I have a hard time running outside in the cold weather, so the gym provided a nice place for me to run on the treadmill when running outside wasn't possible. In addition to the treadmill, I began adding squats, crunches, and weight lifting to my routine. I noticed my arms started looking more toned and I had muscle definition for the first time in my life. I'm naturally very small and thin, so my arms had always lacked definition and was pretty tiny. I didn't want bulging muscles; but I did want definition.
I was in the best shape of my life June 2013--just three months before I discovered I had breast cancer. I didn't get breast cancer in September--it had been there for a while, so this meant I was exercising and keeping up my normal routine of life while my body was busy trying to fight cancer. I had no idea--I felt perfectly fine. After my sentinal node biopsy in September, I was told no running, no gym, and no working out at all. I couldn't risk preventing the void under my arm from healing and postponing my chemo. I went almost three weeks without working out or running. I had never sat on my butt so much in my entire life, and it was driving me crazy. My legs were aching constantly from lack of exercise--my body was accustomed to working out.
Two weeks ago, my doctor gave me permission to start running again as well as limited time in the gym. I am not allowed to lift weights yet, but at this point, I will take what I can get. I cannot run as far as I was running in June; but I will get it back quickly. My first time back in the gym last week felt so good. As I was working out, I thought to myself "I am pushing my body and working out, and I do not feel or look sick--how can I have cancer?" This made me think back to all the working out I've done over the past nine months, and it dawned on me I likely had cancer a majority of that time; yet I never once felt sick--even while pushing my body to the limit.
I then started thinking about why I felt so healthy even while my body was clearly fighting a deadly disease. All that running that began as an outlet for frustration may, in fact, be a very good reason why I am handling my chemo so well. I plan to continue working out and running as much as I can during my treatment. I believe it's good for my body to remain strong and in shape while I'm fighting this disease. I realize I won't be able to push myself as much as I used to, and sometimes, I may simply be too tired to go to the gym; but I have every intention of keeping up my workout routine. I'm asking my body to fight a disease that is deadly. The least I can do for it is to stay in shape and take care of it.
For those reading this who are also fighting breast cancer, I highly recommend continuing to work out if you did before you were diagnosed. If you didn't, please consider a low impact routine approved by your physician. For those who are not fighting cancer and just reading this, please consider starting a routine. It doesn't have to be running like I chose. Choose whatever works for you. You never know what your future may hold and what your body may need to fight off. A decision to become healthy now may impact your ability to fight in the future. I had no idea my decision seven years ago would help me so much in my fight now; but I know, without a doubt, it is.
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