My Hospital Stay & Preparing For AC

It's been a week and three days since my last AC treatment.  I have my second of four treatments this coming Friday; and I am not looking forward to it at all with the exception of having yet another behind me and getting closer to being done!  AC has not been kind to me so far, and I only have one under my belt.  Since my last treatment, I've had some vicious nausea, vomiting, constipation and alternating diarrhea.  After finally recovering from that, all I could do was sleep and feel awful in general.  Finally, the heartburn that accompanies AC treatments is the worst imaginable heartburn.  It's unlike any heartburn I've ever had before.  It's in my throat, chest, back, and even lower back/abdomen.  And the pain is very painful.  I take Pepcid to try to keep it under control, but even that doesn't always work. So, I've said all this to make it very clear why I'm absolutely dreading my treatment this coming Friday. Because I get to start all of that all over again.  Isn't that a party?!

On Friday, January 31, 2013, I awoke at 6 a.m. excited.  I actually had plans that didn't revolve around breast cancer or treatments.  I had slept rough the night before, and I was awake with severe pains in my chest and back all night; but I was determined to keep moving and ignore it. I had promised my coworkers I would make homemade noodles and bring them to the office for everyone to enjoy for lunch.  I missed both the Thanksgiving and Christmas parties at the office this year thanks to doctor appointments, so everyone was excited to eat my noodles.  I was excited to make them for everyone.  I began beating eggs and flour in a bowl at 6 a.m. and sipping water trying to get the heartburn that never seemed to leave under control.  I rolled out the dough and patiently cut the noodles.  Without meaning to, I had got the dough the perfect combination of eggs and flour.  Not too sticky and not too tough.  These going to be one of my best batches of noodles in a long time!  The chicken broth, water, and cream of chicken soup was slowly bubbling in the large cooker behind me ready for the noodles.  I slowly added the noodles feeling like Martha Stewart for creating a perfect batch for such a great group of people who were looking forward to them.  I stirred them one last time, turned the heat down to let them cook slowly, and headed to the couch with my water.

The heartburn or whatever this was had become pretty painful.  And I kept feeling dizzy and lightheaded.  Something didn't feel right.  But I was determined not to let anything stop me from visiting my coworkers and feeding them today.  I had promised.  It was time to head upstairs to shower and get myself ready.  As I headed up the stairs, a wave of pain hit me so hard I stopped in my tracks and sat on the step.  I was home alone.  My son had drove my daughter to school for me so I could work on the noodles.  He would be home any minute.  I decided to check the noodles then stay on the couch until he got home so as not to pass out while home alone.  While laying on the couch, the pain was getting increasingly worse, and I was beginning to have trouble breathing.  I kept seeing bright spots in front of my eyes, and the urge to fall asleep was becoming impossible to fight.  What was wrong with me?  I decided to call my doctor and explain my symptoms to see what she would like me to do.  After explaining my symptoms, I was instructed to go to my local ER immediately.  Thankfully, my son had come back home while I was on the phone.  I told him we needed to head to the ER, and he grabbed my keys and headed back outside to start my car.  After unplugging the noodles, I threw on the first pair of yoga pants I grabbed, a tshirt, and tied a bandanna on my head.  I didn't have a stitch of makeup on, and I didn't care.  I threw all my medication in a bag along with my deodorant and my cell phone charger.  Necessitates in case I was there a while.

As we were leaving the driveway, I noticed my radio wasn't coming on or lit up.  My radio is a radio and built in navigation system, and the "theft" light was blinking.  Seriously?  As if I didn't have enough to deal with.  I called Honda while my son drove, and was informed my battery charge must have dropped so low that my car was unable to keep the radio powered, and it switched it to anti-theft mode.  It now wanted a code to unlock it.  They informed me this code was stuck inside my glove box. Nope, not in my glove box.  I bought my car new three years ago, and I went through everything they had given me to put in my glove box, and there was not a radio code.  I was informed if I couldn't find the code, I would have to take it to a dealership to get it unlocked.  Plus, I clearly needed a new battery.  Great!  Just what I wanted to hear.  At least I knew what was going on with my radio for now though.  At this point, I was in so much pain, I didn't care.  And the dizziness was about to take over.

As we checked into the hospital, I felt silly for being at the ER.  I've never been one to visit the ER.  I figured whatever I was feeling had a simple explanation.  It was now 8:30 a.m.  And the ER was quite busy.  Of course it was.  I was in a bed in the ER before I knew it.  I explained all the things I was feeling, and they quickly decided to run a CT scan to look for blood clots.  Additionally, an EKG was done as well as labs.  For my son, time was likely creeping by.  He hadn't slept all night, and now he was sitting in a very uncomfortable chair in the ER.  For me, time is a blur.  I all the various tests, and I remember a lot of pain.  I remember the doctor asking me if I wanted something for the pain, and I told him no.  I stubbornly said I had given birth to three children with no drugs, and I didn't come there for pain killers.  He assured me I could change my mind if needed.  About an hour later, I asked for something for the pain.  I was given a shot of dilaudid.  Within seconds, the pain was gone.  Oh, holy relief.  I could take a breath without pain in my chest and back.  I also fell asleep within moments of the shot.  I had battled the pain all night long so I hadn't slept well all night, plus the shot knocked me on my butt.  I awoke some time later to new pains shooting through my back.  It was back.  My son was laying on the cold hospital floor asleep.  I needed to pee, and I needed a drink.  I glanced at the clock.  It was noon.  I had been here four hours already?

I unhooked myself from the monitors and went to the bathroom.  Without any other option, I awoke my son and asked him to go get me something to drink.  I felt like I hadn't drank anything in months.  He went without complaint.  I called my nurse.  Were any of my test results back?  The nurse informed me they were back, but the doctor had to review them.  By this time, I was in quite a bit of pain again.  But I wasn't taking more medication.  I could handle it.  An hour later, I was in tears hitting my call light.  the nurse came back, took one look at me and knew why I had called her.  I was given a second shot of dilaudid for pain.  Like before, I instantly felt relief.  But this time wouldn't be like last time.  Yes, I fell asleep for a little while.  But when I awoke, I didn't awake because I was in pain again.  I awoke because I felt sick.  I asked my son to grab a puke bowl before I puked all over the floor.  He handed it too me just in time for me to fill it up with everything I had drank earlier.  My son went to get the nurse.  Now, on top of pain, dizziness, and being light headed, I was throwing up.  And we still didn't have a diagnosis.  Finally, the doctor came in.  They couldn't find a reason for my being sick.  That was their answer.  He asked if I wanted to go home or stay the night for observation.  I, of course, chose to go home.  He headed out the door to start discharge papers.

Within an hour, I was throwing up again.  I called the nurse into my room and told her I didn't think it was a good idea to go home without a reason for how I felt and throwing up like I was.  Perhaps I should stay the night?  She said she would talk to the doctor.  They agreed to admit me since I had thrown up again.  20 minutes later, they changed their mind and said they were sending me home with Zofran.  What the heck was wrong with these people?  I was instructed to get dressed as I would be out the door in moments.  Right after getting dressed, I promptly threw up again--everywhere.  I practically crawled back to my ER bed.  After what seemed like forever, a new ER nurse came in my room.  She was now my doctor.  She asked tons of questions and informed me that my White Blood Count was very low, and I would need to spend the night in the hospital so they could give me a shot to boost my WBC, give me antibiotics and help me feel better.  Okay, so now we're back to staying?!  I didn't even care anymore!

My sister and her husband had come at this point.  I told them to take my son home as he hadn't slept since the night before, and there was no point in anyone staying with me.  I would likely be sleeping most of the night anyway.  My sister insisted she was staying with me, but she had just got off work and had to work again the following morning.  There was no way I was allowing her to stay there with me.  Once I was settled in my room, I sent them all home.  No point in everyone suffering because I was sick!  I was given a shot of Heprin in my stomach to prevent blood clots, and I was given a shot in the back of my arm to boost my WBC.  I can't remember the name of it, but it wasn't Neulasta.  I know what that is as I give myself a shot of that at home on the Saturday after my treatments.  My WBC was 1.1, so they were hoping this would boost it to 2.  I just wanted sleep.

At 4:30 a.m, someone came in to draw blood for lab work.  That was a frustrating time to be stuck for blood.  Once he was done, I was wide awake.  I began attempting to watch TV.  I realized how hungry I was.  Since I had spent 13 hours in the ER the day before, I hadn't ate anything all day on Friday.  The last time I had ate was Thursday night at 7 p.m.  And it was Saturday morning.  When I finally heard the breakfast trays in the hall, I was pretty excited.  My excitement went out the window when I saw what was on my tray.  Chicken broth and water.  I almost cried.  I was on a clear liquid diet.  I drank the broth, and pouting, tried to go back to sleep.  I was still hungry so that wasn't easy to do.  As the day wore on, I was brought lunch.  It consisted of yet another bowl of chicken broth and a bottle of water.  I was just getting very grumpy at this point.  Thankfully, my friend Tracy Brinegar smuggled me a cheeseburger in her purse when she came to visit.  I ate it in under a minute.

By dinner, I was certain I would be brought real food so they could ensure I was holding solids down.   After all, they didn't know I had ate that cheeseburger.  But, must to my dismay, my dinner tray was yet another bowl of chicken broth and a bottle of water.  It took everything I had not to throw the tray across my room.  I very nicely told the poor nurse I hadn't ate since Thursday, and I HAD to have some real food.  She said she would check and let me know.  Before I knew it, my tray was being switched for a tray with chicken noodles, green beans, carrots, apple pie, and juice.  I was in heaven!  I then asked my nurses if I would be going home that night and what my labs had shown.  It was clear to me no one had bothered checking.  She came back a few minutes later saying my WBC was now 4.1 and I couldn't likely go home.  I wonder if I hadn't said anything if I would have just spent another night in the hospital eating only broth simply because no one had bothered to follow up on labs.

I was eventually released about 7:15 p.m.  Upon arriving home, I was thankful to be in my own house again.   My daughters brought me home and helped me get settled, and I went straight to bed.  My own bed felt so amazing!  In short, we never really determined for sure the cause of all the pain, but I have my own theroy.  The pain went away as I was starved and given broth only.  When I finally did eat, I felt it inching back.  Because I limited how much I ate and stopped at only eating once, it didn't get out of control.  I had no idea heartburn could hurt like that.  When I think of heartburn, I think of a feeling of fire in the pit of my stomach and throat.  What I felt was pain in my abdomen, chest, upper back, and lower back.  It was enough pain to make me want pain medication, which means it was a lot.  Since returning home, I've learned to be very careful what I eat and not to eat very much.  Otherwise, it gets out of control again.  Funny how us cancer patients are told the importance of eating and maintaining our weight; but we can't eat too much without being in pain because our treatments cause the worse heartburn out there!

I sit here on a Monday night feeling "okay".  My body aches, but I can survive it.  I wonder what my WBC would have been this coming Friday before my next treatment had I not went to the ER on Friday.  Would they have even treated me?  I'm thinking not!  So, I am glad I went to the ER because I don't want to get behind on my treatment--even though I'm dreading it.

To anyone about to start AC--It sucks.  I'm not going to lie.  But it is manageable.  At this stage, I have a couple things to suggest (I'm by far no pro; but this is what I've learned so far).

1.  Make sure your bowels are moving before your treatment.  I recommend taking 2 Senokot nightly at least three days prior to treatment.  AC causes severe constipation, so having soft stools when you get it can help prevent it from being so bad.

2.  Keep several bottles of the Saline Laxative Solution on hand.  If you feel you're constipated, don't wait.  Drink it.  If you wait, you'll start throwing up.  I plan to drink a bottle of this the day after my treatment to stay ahead of the constipation before it happens this week.

3.  I was prescribed medication to prevent nausea last week.  Both of them MADE me sick rather than prevent me from feeling sick.  I didn't figure that out right away, so I will not be taking them at all.  Perhaps we can try something else, but I will not be taking the Zyprexa.  It was the major culprit of my vomiting last week.

4.  I felt drunk after my treatment last week.  That was a new experience after all my Taxol treatments where I felt perfectly normal after my treatments.  I know what to expect this time, so I figure I will be sleeping most of the day on my day of treatments now.  And even the day after.

5.  Everyone told me to "stay ahead of the nausea".  I think I will wait until I begin feeling a little sick to take someone.  Trying to stay ahead of it seemed to make me sick last week.

So, far, that's all I know!  I ask everyone to keep me in their prayers this week as Friday approaches.  I'm dreading it, but want it to get here to get it over with.

God Bless, and tell those you love what they mean to you.  Say it because you feel it and want them to know.  Not because a holiday tells you to.  =)