Chemo 9 of 12 (Taxol), December 20, 2013
My youngest daughter, Makya, took me to my 9th chemo appointment. We were excited to get the chemo appointment over with so we could head to the Easton Mall and enjoy the Christmas lights and soak up the atmosphere that IS Easton during the holiday season. My blood work showed my counts had dropped a little from my previous appointment, but they were still within what's considered a normal range. Abigail was watching for me to come in, and she made sure she did my IV, which told me it was going to be a good day. She always gets it on the first try without any issues. As expected, she did a fabulous job, and I didn't feel a thing. One more week down in the books without a port! That's simply another win against cancer as far as I'm concerned! I had my steroid shot before my chemo began. As much as I hate it, I do love the energy it gives me. I suppose it's a love/hate relationship because while the extra energy is nice, that extra energy makes sleeping almost impossible. Before I knew it, the IV was beeping and I was done. I've noticed chemo always goes really fast when the IV is done correctly as it doesn't hurt the entire time, and I'm not counting down the hour to get the IV out! My daughter and I happily headed out and drove to the mall.
As always, Easton didn't fail to keep us occupied. We went into Barnes and Noble book store, and I believe it was about two hours later that we emerged. We are both avid readers, and to us, there is simply no replacement for a good book and reading. Each of us would prefer to read a book than to watch the movie. What is shown in a move is never as good as what we imagine while reading a story. Of my three children, my youngest daughter truly inherited my love for books, reading, and history. After a walk past the massive tree outdoors, we walked around laughing and spending some mother-daughter time together. While driving home later, my daughter laughed at me and told me I was "talking a mile a minute". I told her "that's your mom on steroids". At a certain point, you have to just laugh at cancer and all the associated crap that goes along with it. Laughter is truly your saving grace!
Chemo 10 of 12 (Taxol), December 27, 2013 & Oncologist Check-up
Today marked number 10 of 12 total for Taxol. It's hard to believe I am so close to finishing up my rounds of Taxol. I will have a three week break after finishing up the Taxol, then I am scheduled to begin the A/C combo. I will receive four treatments of A/C; but they will be every other week, so even though it's only four treatments, they will span over an eight week period. At any rate, I'm well over half way done with all of my chemo treatments, and I'm very thankful to have felt so GOOD during my treatments so far. My chemo nurse informed me last week I will have to get a shot every day while on A/C. This shot boosts your white blood counts as A/C really does a number on your white blood counts, and it can be a lot tougher than Taxol. I am trying very hard to have faith in God that I will continue to do so well on my upcoming chemo; but there is a part of me that is truly afraid I won't continue to be so lucky. I want nothing more than to continue to work and do all the things I've been doing. To stay strong, and truly tell cancer to kiss my butt because I'm not giving in to it. But, as a very good friend of mine told me, I can't play superwoman forever, and I have to sit down and REST.
I'm trying to follow her advice tonight. I have plenty of energy tonight thanks to a steroid shot, but I know my body is tired. I didn't sleep well last night, and I have not slept well for the past few nights. Emotionally, I've had a rough week, so it's affected my ability to sleep. Last night, I had hot flashes all night, and kept me from sleeping. Alternating between being cold and then instantly overwhelmingly hot truly prevents you from resting! It's quite frustrating. So, although I need to clean my house, I would love to take down the Christmas tree and get my furniture back in its place, I'm sitting on the couch and doing absolutely nothing. The week prior to Christmas was very hectic, and I rarely sat down. I spent A LOT of time in the kitchen cooking and baking. I do this every year for the holidays, and it was exhausting when I wasn't going through treatment. So, this year was particularly tiring. However, I powered through, and I'm proud to say I was not only able to keep up with every tradition we do every year, but I believe I baked a little more than I normally do this year. My goal was to ensure cancer didn't affect Christmas for my family, and I believe I met that goal as much as I possibly could. Unfortunately, that led to me finding myself pretty tired by Thursday night (the night before chemo). Typically, I have found I felt really GOOD the day before more poison was injected in my veins. This week was different, and I could tell I had been pushing myself too hard.
My friend, Carly Crow took me to my appointment today. I cannot begin to express how grateful I am for my children and my friends who have taken time out of their day to take me to my appointments. Carly is off work for the holidays, and she not only used one of her days off work to make the 1.5 hour drive to my treatment center (one way) and to sit at the clinic with me most of the day; but she also took me to my appointment not feeling well at all. She absolutely refused to bail on me and leave me with no one to take me. Cancer has already taught me many lessons, but one of the biggest is the unconditional love friends like Carly show as well as the efforts my children have taken to be there for me. I have truly learned how much I am loved and by so many.
Today, I also had a checkup with my oncologist. Everything went fine. I did speak with my oncologist regarding the emotional difficulties I have faced this week. I plan to address some of this in a future blog, but I'm not ready to discuss it at this time. It's a personal issue I need to face, and I will address it so my readers who are facing the same issue can benefit from it; but it's not something I can blog about at this time. Eventually, I will so please don't give up on me. I will meet with my oncologist again in two weeks when I'm finishing up my final dose of Taxol.
As always, I received my steroid shot prior to my chemo. On that note, I want to again tell women who are facing steroid induced acne that my face is, chest and back is still clear, so the items my dermatologist gave me to keep it under control work. I highly recommend requesting this if you're having issues with acne during treatment. We are facing enough during this ordeal. A face that looks like a pubescent teen shouldn't be one of them! Thirty minutes later, my chemo began. All went fine, and Carly and I were laughing and keeping the chemo floor in fits of laughter. The photo above was taken as I was heading to the bathroom. In a fit of laughter, I said "that's it ladies. I'm taking my pole and leaving!". A few moments before my bag of poison was empty, Carly noticed I had a "scratch" on my forehead. She asked "did you scratch yourself?". I pulled out my phone and used the camera to look at my forehead. I hadn't scratched myself, and Carly said "OMG...we have to call someone in here. You're getting a rash!". In true Carly form, she stuck her head into the hall and said "Hey, we got a rash in here!" Have I said how much I love this girl? Her sense of humor and the laughs we share CONSTANTLY when together are amazing. A nurse immediately came in and looked at my forehead. She then checked my hands. Sure enough, I had a strange spotty rash on the top of my right hand as well. Leave it to me to develop what they call the Taxol rash on the 10th treatment. She informed me that it was pretty much harmless as long as I wasn't having difficulties breathing and the rash didn't itch uncontrollably. A few moments later, my IV beeped, and I was done with my treatment. Within moments of the treatment ending, the rash began disappearing. So, no big deal, and no sign of a rash now.
After treatment, Carly and I grabbed some dinner at Olive Garden. I ate an unbelievable amount of salad, and I'm not quite sure where I put it all. I haven't ate much over the past few days, so I think I was making up for the food I haven't been eating!
As a final comment, I would like to encourage those who are facing breast cancer to do everything you can to stay positive. It's impossible to be positive every moment of every day. Breast cancer is scary, and it can get the best of you from time to time. You will have good and bad days no matter how positive you are, and that's okay. You're entitled. That means you are normal. What's important is that you can allow yourself to be sad and deal with your bad day then move forward and be strong and positive again. A week ago, I received a random friend request on Facebook from someone I did not know. I almost didn't approve it; but at the last minute, I decided to approve it since I'm a member of a breast cancer awareness site on Facebook, and I had recently had my story featured on their site. I had listed my Facebook information for anyone who wanted to speak to me, and I didn't want to ignore someone who may be looking for support. I am so glad I thought twice before clicking that ignore button. She truly was sent to me by God. She too is facing Triple Negative Breast Cancer, and we quickly determined we have A LOT in common besides breast cancer. But we also discovered we are each facing all the same feelings, emotions, and issues. We are 1,000's of miles from one another but fighting in the same fight. Feeling all the same feelings and fears. And I cannot tell you how refreshing it is to talk to someone who is going through what you're going through. Who truly understands your method of thinking and doesn't judge you. The past week has been very difficult for me, and having her to talk to has saved me. She truly talked me off the edge of an emotional cliff I am not sure I could have survived if not for her. She is a God send, and I have no doubt the two of us will remain life-long friends who are supporting each other long after we've both beat this dreadful disease. She was a reminder that God loves me and wants me to be happy. So he sent her to me at a time I needed her most.
Take Care and Hug those you love!
No comments:
Post a Comment